Last night i dreamed again for the second week in a row my dog Kobe dying. but this time it was different, it was better.
Since a med change i had nightmares began. Actually i don't know if i mind them too much, of course i don't like them but it isn't a terrifying thought i have before i fall asleep, i don't fear sleeping. It is just excessive, repetitive, and very realistic including real tears and screams.
I have walked around my yard carrying my dogs limp body, I've patted him on his bum telling him to sit while accidentally breaking his back legs, i keep seeing or knowing he is dead and it hurts. i woke some day ago with a firm belief i had really lost him, death wont take him from me though :)
The part of him i love isn't his fur or paws or slobbery tongue, its the part that is inside i cant touch and thats the part i will remember and remember as the best dog ever. :')
But last nights dream/nightmare, eh really just a bad dream, was different, maybe because of how i went to bed..
i dreamed i was inside my house looking to the back porch. it was empty and i knew Kobe died. it was sudden and he was uncomfortable and alone when he went. I remembered as i stood there my dad telling me he tried to live but just left. my dad took him away. I stood there and everything was grey and almost misty not dark at all though just in a bright grey cloud lighting. My family wasn't home but i wasn't alone. I think i felt compassion from an older woman, distant and also maybe my fathers words/energy echoed inside me. I had the feeling it was okay. That the bad part was over, and he might have not left this world in the best way but it was okay. i felt comfort that was build in knowledge. i understood and knew that moving on didn't mean i was loosing him.
wow i like that. im glad i remember this, ha it actually is a dream i guess, not a bad ending really.
That night i had done much stretching and drank tea and a lot of water. i told the women i loved them and put my Quartz crystal next to my little sister who is sick but getting better. I told her it will only help, and it has healing properties to aid her. She said 'i whanna tuch ittt', with drool, i told her we share our thought in it now and i had only put her best intention in it. (now the crystal sits in my pocket). I was zonked out from the medicine surprisingly more powerful than usual and because of this decided not to meditate before sleep. I stepped outside and gave Kobe his goodnight rub-down and told him i loved him and said a magic command i made up which means goodbye and great things are happening. I made the bed and prayed on my knees in various stances, showing my love, and i closed my eyes waiting for rest.
I think the clarity of mind i had before sleep and the good day i had with the ones i loved aided in my positive dream of my dogs death, it comes soon but i am ready. He will never leave me <3
0>TeaKai<0
If you haven't tried Lucid Dreaming, this may help. Look at your feet and hands in your dream. Look closely at printed words until they resolve themselves into readable text. Look closely at every door you pass through. Watch you hand as it turns the knob. These are called reality checks.
ReplyDeleteLook for Dream Signs. For me swimming in water that feels like air -or- flying/floating. Anything that clues you in that you are in a dream. This is another therapy for altered states of consciousness. Plus you can have unlimited sex with Halle Berry.